I wasn’t innocent. No one ever is at that age. And the advantage of the age of ten is that no one suspects you are the devil’s errand kid. Not unless you let it get to you and decide to scream about it. At ten years old you are at the perfect stage of character […]

           “Let me tell you, duck meat is the deal.” “Nope. Chicken meat is the thing.” “You’re saying that because you haven’t tasted a goose.”  I chipped in and maintained that beef was in fact the deal. This conversation was with my sister and two other people who hold no importance.  “Of course we  know […]

I’m a whore for handbags and shoes. Right now I have only two handbags left because I have sisters so… Between the two there’s one I love the most. It’s blue with tiny white flowers. Denim on the inside and some fabric I don’t know on the outside. Double stranded. Spacious. Gorgeous. Inside I always […]

Before you ask, no, I haven’t watched the movie. I don’t know if I ever will so let’s drop it. And just so we’re clear, I’m talking about men, the movie is about boys. So, this is a letter. From me to all these men.The men I’ve shamelessly taken to bed every single time my […]

I’m not a lady.I’m a woman.Call me a woman. Growing up I was, as was every female I know, taught to behave a certain way. To sit this way and walk that way. To talk that way and to eat this way. I was told to be a lady. “Why?” I asked. “Why can’t I […]

      I’ve imagined myself as a lot of things. From a cop to a stripper in a gay club to a maid in some unheard of state. I’ve been a road and a cow and a wall and water too. Oh, God, I’ve been to a lot of places. I’m going to tell you how […]